The Virtue of Silence

In honor of the baseball season starting yesterday, I'm pitching a double header this week! (Okay, that's just a random coincidence, and I apologize for the bad sports joke.) But it's the truth: two new stories are going up this week: a short poem followed by a less short story (being published by North by Northwestern). First up, poetry. Don't you just love spelling in the English language?

Qualify

Throughout my writing, I've discovered that I have a proclivity for the vertical curves that set clauses apart. You know, parentheses. They enable clarification but may also create convolution. They allow for emphasis of details but can also radiate sarcasm. Whether you view these as shortcomings or not, parentheses are hands down (or up) the best punctuation. Here is my ode to them. (Disclaimer: I may have bent some parenthetical rules for this piece. Trust me, I know.)

The Oldest Bellboy and the Case of the Missing Luggage

Detective shows are all the rage right now. Everyone's watching them. Except for me. Nevertheless, the air is still filled with the latent urge to solve mysteries. So here's a short mystery, albeit my twisted take on the genre. Who knows, this piece might even spawn a series!

The Metric Inchworm

Why are puns so funny? If we created language solely for the purpose of making puns, I would be totally okay with it. In fact, I think that's a better reason for developing speaking and writing than for some lowly communication purposes. Especially because communication so often adopts the mis- prefix, resulting in troubles beyond imagination. Here is that story.

Wurds...And We're Back!

Welcome back to the blog! I hope it was missed. It was, right? Right? It's been about a year since there's been a new post, but that doesn't mean I stopped writing. Far from it. Amidst directing a short film, writing scripts, and publishing stories on North by Northwestern, I've still managed to amass a collection of fiction, just waiting to be broadcast to the world. Well wait no longer, my tales; you are now free.

In other words, I'm relaunching the blog! I won't give an exact end date, but I can tell you that you should check back every Tuesday for at least the next 4 months. Yes, that's right. More than 16 new works of fiction, poems, or general absurdity. Starting...now.

Desperation and Potatoes

I apologize, but I am posting my first non-fiction story to this blog. No made up creatures. No rhymes. Just potatoes. Don't worry too much though; it's still over the top, slightly exaggerated, and sure to tickle your funny bones into submission. Here it is, published by North by Northwestern!

Cake

What? Another story, and so quickly, too? That's right, good readers. I'm on a roll! (No promise it will last.) So slice yourself a piece of Cake (click on "Gluttony") and dig in! (All apologies for the horrible metaphor.)