Tuesday, September 18, 2012

My Sister Ate My Homework

Everybody's starting school back up, and with school comes the dreaded homework.  As bad as it can be, hopefully it doesn't end up like it does in this poem.

My sister ate my homework,
Oh yes, I swear it is true.
When I found out the bad deed
I squealed like an old kazoo.

Now my math is all shredded,
My answer sheet torn to bits.
I don’t know what I can do;
I feel like I’m in the pits.

But how do I know it’s sis?
Let me tell it to you straight:
I caught her bright red-handed,
As I ran for the door, late.

She had my work in her mouth,
Shreds dangling from her white teeth.
Numbers were stuck on her tongue,
With even more underneath.

She must have thought it was grits,
Or maybe mashed potatoes.
No matter her thought process,
All that’s on my mind are woes.

I thought only dogs ate it,
And not little human girls.
Well I found out the hard way
That they can also be churls.

Now what to tell my teacher?
Should I lie or tell the truth?
One is proper, one farfetched;
With both she’ll think me uncouth.

It is a lose-lose ordeal,
With no good grade in my sight.
I only blame my sister
For this unfortunate plight.

I’ve learned now to hide my work
From my confused, hungry sis.
If I see her grab paper
I’ll know something is amiss.

But in the present I am screwed:
No proof that I did my work.
It’s true, it wasn’t the dog;
It was my sis, what a berk.

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